SMacked One Shot, With all my heart
by lovlyangl
Summary: This is a one shot. Mac and Stella finally deal with their feelings, pain and hurt. Finding that sometimes even best friends can become husband and wife. If willing to take the risk.


**With all my Heart**

**A One Shot...Written by MacsLovlyAngl**

**I do not own these characters. Just the story.**

**Intro**

It was a cold NY night as Stella sat in her little apartment. She often hated coming home. It was hard for her being alone. Even after everything she went through with Frankie she still wanted to be loved. Loved by a man that had been her dreams for five years now.

But how was she to tell him that she loved him when he was her boss, her best friend. She knew her feelings had changed for him, she could feel him everytime he walked by or called. Her heart would race, her body would tingle with pleasure just from his gorgeous smile.

Laying her head upon her pillow she cried. Cried from the loneliness, the mistakes, the needs of her body that craved for his touch. Falling into sleep she dreamed. Dreamed of him.

..........................................................

**Meanwhile** across town, Mac had finished up with a crime scene. Looking at his watch he noticed it was three in the morning. Knowing he needed someone to talk to he wished Stella was awake. She was always his guidence, his strength that gave him the will to go on.

Heading home he dreaded it. Everything in his life had changed after Claire died. His heart was empty, his soul was crying inside to feel, to feel the touch of love once again. He wanted a family, a child, a wife. Family that was his and his alone. But what was he to do. He hadn't dated since Peyton. After what she had done to him, the cowardly way she left him through a dear john letter.

Arriving at home. He unlocked his door and felt the cold and emptiness hit his heart. How he longed to hear the patter of little feet running to the door yelling...

"Daddy, daddy, daddy."

But yet he realized he was still alone. Haunted by the memories of his saddened heart. Taking off his coat he hung it up. Walking into his living room he sat down looking over at his mantle. Seeing the picture of him and Stella wrapped in each others arms during a staff party last year. He wasn't sure why he kept it, but he did.

Picking it up, he caressed her face. Smiling at her beautiful smile as it glowed in their picture. Placing it back on the mantle he headed into the shower. Turning on the taps, he heard the knock on his door. Turning off the water he threw a towel around his waist and answered it.

"Stella! What's the matter?" asked Mac shocked that she had shown up at his door. Funny he thought to himself. How he would think of her and she would suddenly appear.

"Umm... nothing Mac. I just didn't want to be alone. May I come in?" asked Stella.

"Of course," said Mac

Allowing her to walk by he could smell her heated perfume fill his home. A scent he had long forgotten since Claire. Closing the door he took her coat.

"Would you like a coffee?" Mac asked.

"Sure. That'd be great Mac," said Stella.

Walking into his living room she seen their picture on the mantle.

"I didn't know you kept this Mac?" said Stella.

He was lost for words. He realized he had forgotten to hide the picture. He never left it out when she came over. For he knew he would be forced to answer questions about it. Questions he wasn't sure he was ready for.

"Oh! Yeah. Well...um. Here's your coffee," said Mac nervously.

"Thanks," said Stella as she sat down.

Mac could see the tiredness in her eyes.

"Stella... you look tired. Are you not sleeping?" asked Mac.

Sleeping? How could she sleep when Mac was constantly invading her dreams.

"Um.. no. It's been a few restless night," Stella said.

"Is something bother you? Something you'd like to talk about?" asked Mac.

Oh yeah. There was lots she wanted to talk about. But how was she to start? How did she know once Mac found out how she felt, he wouldn't run. What if his feelings weren't the same. How could she live, if he rejected her?

"No. I guess I just didn't want to be alone. Plus I knew you'd be up," said Stella.

Mac could tell she was troubled. He could always tell when she was in pain or confused. He also noticed her hands were shaking. But was it the cold? Or was it him. He wasn't sure himself, but he knew he was tempted to test the waters of Stella Bonasera. He couldn't help himself. For he had felt the changes himself over the last year. Getting up, he walked over and sat beside her on the couch.

"What is it Stella? Talk to me please," said Mac.

Taking his hand he placed his fingers under her chin and raised her face to his.

"Please Stella. Tell me what's wrong," Mac asked again.

As he watched, he seen the tears form in her eyes. As Stella silently whispered...

_"I don't want to be alone anymore Mac. I don't want to spend another night not being loved. I want to have a family, a child, a husband who loves me and our children. All these haunts Mac are invading my mind. Each night my dreams for a family become more vivid, more real."_

_"Stella... I understand, believe me when I say I do. It's the same for me. Ever since Claire died I've been torn inside. We were robbed of our lives togther. Now I'm left alone in my cold home with not even a child to love. I hate the lonely nights, I hate falling asleep and waking up to a cold empty bed. For six years now I've suffered in my pain and heartache. So I understand Stella."_

Wiping her teardrops with his thumb he could see her eyes slowly close as her face caressed into his palm. Bringing his fingers lower he traced the outline of her lips. So soft, so tempting to taste her flavour, her beauty, that was Stella Bonasara.

Slowly opening her eyes she stared into Mac's. She could see the need, the want to be loved by her.

"_Maaaac..."_ Stella whispered.

He knew what they were doing was wrong. For they were a team, best friends. But why the hell did it feel so right to touch, to caress, to stroke her. Leaning in at the same time their lips met, just an inch away from a kiss, a touch, as they felt each others breath upon them.

Moving in the final breath, their lips touched with gentleness, with care. Hearing her quiet sigh as it melted away with his. Breaking the kiss they looked into each others eyes and seen the passion burning within them as Stella whispered...

_"I love you Mac. I love you so much. Please love me. Please make me yours. Don't deny us the passion we are both feeling."_

He knew his body was saying yes, but he also knew if he did they would cross the bounderies of their friendship forever.

_"I'm sorry Stella. I just can't,"_ whispered Mac.

Feeling her tears build again, Stella asked...

_"Why Mac? Why can't you love me. When I can feel this is what you want, when I can see the passion in your eyes, telling me without words that you love me too."_

_"I'm scared Stella. I'm scared if I touch you, if I love you that you will disappear like Claire did. I can't do that again, Stella. I can't take the chance of losing my only best friend,"_ Mac whispered with misted eyes.

Stella had no idea Mac was so terrified of losing her. She had no idea, that was why he had kept his feelings for her hidden.

_"Oh Mac. You could never lose me. I could never leave you behind. I'm just as scared Mac. Scared that you will disappear from my life too. But I'm willing to take that chance, I'm willing to risk it all for our love. Don't you understand Mac. It's you I love. It's you I've fallen in love with over the years. Believe me I've tried to fight my feelings for you, but I don't want to anymore. I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering the what if's."_

Deep down Mac knew Stella was right. He knew the pain, the anger, the hurt needed to be let out. Let out so they could both learn to trust in love again.

"_I just don't want to risk losing you, Stella. Can't you understand that yes I love you too. But I don't want to lose you. I don't want to have to spend each day alone, ever again. I wouldn't survive losing another woman in my life. It's all a risk Stella. Please understand,"_ whispered Mac.

With tears in her eyes Stella got up, grabbed her jacket, turned around and walked out Mac's door. Placing his hands into his face, he rubbed them as the tears ran down his face.

_"What the hell are you doing Mac? She's offering you her love. A love that could last a lifetime. And you're what... throwing it all away because you're scared of losing her?" _said his conscience.

Trying to get the thoughts out of his head, he realized she was right. He realized that love was they both needed, both craved. He realized that everyday was a chance we took on life.

Grabbing his coat he ran down the street yelling her name.

"Steeeeeeeella...Steeeeeeeeeeeeeella."

Turning around, Mac seen the tears flooding from hers eyes. Letting him know he had hurt her deeply inside.

"I'm sorry Stella. I'm so, so sorry. You were right. I do need you, I need you like I need the air to breathe, I need you like the flowers need the sun. Do you understand Stella? I want to love you forever. I want to have children with you, a family with you. Share my home with you. Please forgive me for being so stubborn."

Stella couldn't breathe. Mac had her wrapped so tightly in his arms. Afraid to let go in fear that she would say no. That she would turn back around and leave his life forever.

"_Shh... Come on Mac. It's going to be okay. Mac... please look at me,"_ whispered Stella.

As Mac losened his grip, he looked up into her eyes as she said...

"_Yes Mac. Yes I will come home with you. Yes I will love you forever. But most of all Mac... I will give you a family. Us a family. I will take the forever you are offering. For as long as we both live."_

Wrapping her back in his arms they walked towards his home. Walked towards the begining of what would be their future. Both taking what life offered them, each other.

**Epi**

It had been three years of togetherness for Mac and Stella Taylor. As the moment drew near for her to give birth to their first child. A child that would become known as "MaKayla Mackenzie Taylor."

**The End.**


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